Many parent worry about their children during a divorce.  How will the
divorce effect them?  What actions will should the parent take to assist the
child through the divorce?  What impact does arguing between the parties
have on the children?  What can I do if my former spouse is creating
conflict or poisoning my child(ren) against me?

PACT.  Illinois Supreme Court Rule 924 requires that divorcing parents
take a "
parenting class" designed to educate parents how children are
affected by the splitting of their parents, including impact of parents'
actions and words.  The class in Winnebago and Boone counties is called

There are many schools of thought and research done to ascertain what a
should/should not do and say to the other parent and child.   No
matter what theory of child rearing to which you prescribe, there are basic
needs a child has:

  • to feel part of a family
  • to be loved for who the child is rather than the child's  actions
  • have a wanted and welcome environment
  • right to express all feelings whether positive or negative
  • right to experience all feelings whether positive or negative
  • right to be treated respectfully at all times

Research has shown that children can easily adapt to the various
routines/rules of both parent's households as long as the rules/routines
are consistent.  Children not only need but want a relationship with the
other parent.  Both parents should encourage a relationship with the other
parent and any stepparents.  You must encourage visitation and
interaction with the other parent through your words and actions.
Attorney Angela Lund-Logan, Attorneys & Lawyers, Loves Park, IL